Sweet and Sour: Queditorial Mixology
This past Saturday, your hard-working Queditors got together to plan this week’s issue. And to help, um, lubricate the weekend’s collaboration, we introduced a cocktail shaker into our efforts to create the Quest. A few tumblers (and several Cher hits) later, we found ourselves having mapped out a pretty solid paper. So in this spirit, of, well, spirits (har har), we bring you our ideal deadline drinks: cocktails that make deadline oh-duh-so-easy because they go down easy.
Choi’s Deadline Drink: The Sweet Sidecar
2 oz cognac
1 oz Cointreau
1 lemon (for juice and zest)
1 oz lemon juice
1 oz lemon syrup (sugar, water, and zest)
Sidecars are like the siren of the cocktail world. Drink in too much of its enchanting, innocent sweetness, and you’ll soon find yourself prey to its trap: namely, short-term amnesia and/or the much-feared “Vom Perignon.” In other words, it’s deceptively alcoholic. Really. Fucking. Deceptively. Alcoholic.
Here’s what to do: Zest a lemon. Over medium heat, bring about two cups of water a boil. Lower heat, add roughly one cup of sugar and zest. Let it cool and juice that lemon in the meantime. Grab your shaker, some ice, and some classy-ass tumblers. Throw in one part Cointreau, two parts ‘yac, and the rest in the proportions listed above. If you’re feeling particularly decadent, use the leftover lemon juice to coat the rim with sugar.
Have fun—but no more than two, alright?
Johnny’s Deadline Drink: A Super-Duper Simple Whiskey Sour
1.5 oz Maker’s Mark bourbon whiskey
1 can San Pellegrino Limonata
Ah, whiskey. What more could a person ask for, really? Nothing, that’s what. Available right down the hall from the Quoffice at Homer’s, Limonata is sour with just enough sweet to make it whiskey’s ideal partner for a college student without time to fuss over a frilly cocktail (sup Choi?). Simply pour bourbon into a tumbler over ice and pour in some Limonata. It’s more than happy to take a backseat to the ambrosia we know lovingly as Maker’s Mark without letting itself get bullied into submission.
Drink number one bestows the perfect working buzz: enough to make me relax and forget how stressed I am without interfering with my ability to get work done. Drink number two lulls me softly to sleep a couple hours later.