Surviving School with Seneca: Advice from the Ancients
Whether it’s your first year at Reed or your last, the new school year is a hard reset. Your courses from last year are now forgotten to you, their contents now only residing somewhere in your subconscious to plague you in dreams; your flames of yesteryear may be miles away or lurking behind a corner, ready to remind you of how hard you fumbled or were fumbled; and your youthful vigor has been restored temporarily (and your short term memory shorted) after a summer of doomscrolling. Now that we are ready to embark on our new adventures, taking time to revisit the wisdom of yore could be in order. In looking back at the sage words of Seneca, we may be able to find some applicable aphorisms to take along with us and tame the turmoil to come.
We suffer more in imagination than in reality.
It’s easy to get caught up in anticipation and natural to imagine what exactly could go wrong. We think about all the possible outcomes of any action because we want to ensure that we are making our best guess. After all, it’s all of our first times living. If we consistently go back to what could go wrong and torment ourselves with things that haven’t happened, we are dampening our mood for no good reason. It’s inevitable that sometimes we’ll do poorly on a test, or say something insensitive to someone else, or make some other misstep even when we intended for something entirely different. Instead of focusing on what could go wrong, we should focus on what we can control and what we see before us in reality. That way, instead of being sad, anxious, or angry over things that have yet to–and may never– come to pass, we are utilizing our mental energies to improve our circumstances in the world we actually live in.
All cruelty springs from weakness.
Every so often we encounter someone who simply isn’t kind. The admissions office, sadly, doesn’t screen for that. Whether they have it out for you personally or were born with a sour spoon in their mouth, we all have to deal with those who rub us in the wrong way. If we can’t do anything to communicate with them, it’s best to reflect internally so we can get on with our lives and still thrive in our environment. The way that we treat others is a mirror. Our beliefs about ourselves and our perceptions of the world come out when we judge others for the way that they look, act, or speak. While it’s best to assume ignorance over malice, sometimes those who are insecure in themselves take it out on other people. Find a way to hold some compassion for them and their struggle, and when it’s our turn to choose kindness with someone whom we may not like or find annoying, we can use our experiences to make that interaction easier.
Enjoy present pleasures in such a way as not to injure future ones.
When you’re off on your own in college, it can be easy to overindulge in anything. Whether you start building a Commons Grill quesadilla or a Jägerbomb habit, decide League of Legends is more important than Logic 201, or can’t stop spending every afternoon hanging out with that cutie from Kerr, finding balance between our obligations and our obsessions will make exam crunch time easier and keep us in the upper layers of essay hell (no one wants to betray themselves and join Cassius, Brutus, and Judas when that ten-pager is due). Maintaining our physical health allows us the energy to focus when we need to, maintaining our academic health keeps us out of the catch-up zone, and maintaining our social health means we can revisit our platonic and romantic relationships when it’s time to recharge and do something fun. The first step is checking in with yourself regularly about how you’re spending your time and implementing new routines where they’re needed, allowing yourself to take further steps to keep your affairs in order.
To be everywhere is to be nowhere.
There’s a lot going on at all times at Reed. It’s easy to bite off more than you can chew with classes, social engagements, campus events, and more. It’s hard to appreciate where you’re at if you’re always rushing to the next thing. Putting too much on your plate may seem manageable at first if you have eyes bigger than your stomach, but eventually everything will congeal and make it hard to keep track of what’s what. Picking a couple of campus clubs that you care about, a job, and maybe even a personal project is more than enough to keep your schedule packed on top of classes, connections, and coursework. Remember not to compare yourself to your friends. Some of us are friends with maniacs who can subsist off of four hours of sleep and two cans of Yerb for eight months straight, take five classes, run several clubs, and still manage to show up to most parties, but that doesn’t mean you should or even could (seeing as you’ll catch them falling asleep while standing up more than once).
There is no enjoying the possession of anything valuable unless one has someone to share it with.
The motto has communism in it for a reason. Whether you have a Nintendo or a pack of playing cards, finding ways to share with others will allow you to build connections with common interests. Because I have an apartment, I like to host movie nights each week to catch up with my friends and share my love for cinema with all willing to sit through whatever is on Criterion. While a freshman stuck in Sully won’t have access to the same options as someone living on their own, many of the dorms offer kitchen amenities and living spaces that are easy to congregate in. Throwing small low-stakes social events can be scary when it requires reaching out to people you don’t know that well and asking them to spend time with you, but those who accept may just end up being your best friends.
No man is more unhappy than he who never faces adversity. For he is not permitted to prove himself.
The coursework at Reed is often challenging, and it can be hard to keep your confidence when you’re not sure how well you’re doing. However, a part of the point of being at Reed and going to a college that pushes its students is that you’re able to learn from your mistakes. Someone who never makes a mistake is someone who never has the opportunity to learn. Identify areas of weakness as places where you can grow, and hold onto areas of strength as places you can feel proud of and continue to cultivate. Talk to your professors if you’re worried that you’re falling behind, or consult with classmates if you’re feeling blue about the latest essay topic. Learning how to be vulnerable and reach out when you’re struggling is the mark of an eager scholar who actually wants to improve, instead of someone who stays stagnant in the face of fear. Use difficult assignments as a chance to show that you are someone who is resilient and resourceful. Be honest with your classmates about your struggles and someone may offer their assistance. Stay in communication with your professors early and often, they appreciate the heads up and are there to help you succeed.
Soft living imposes on us the penalty of debility; we cease to be able to do the things we've long been grudging about doing.
Constant procrastination is a habit that dies hard. While it’s hard to be harsh on yourself and stick to a strict schedule, starting out strong in the beginning of the year means that when the threads come loose later, they have a stronger weave to keep the general fabric together. Don’t be afraid to be the person who Google calendars everything or is constantly jotting down things in their planner when school starts. While my planner always ends up resigned to the bottom of my backpack by early November, starting out by getting a strong handle on assignment structure helps me remember when things are due effortlessly later in the semester.
Associate with people who are likely to improve you. Welcome those whom you are capable of improving.
The people we associate with have a profound impact on the people we become, especially during college, which is an incredibly formative time. Hanging out with people who are ambitious, driven, and kind will make us ambitious, driven, and kind. Hanging out with people who are pessimistic, indolent, and mean-spirited will make us pessimistic, indolent, and mean-spirited. Surround yourself with people who uplift you and make you feel understood, rather than those who say things that are disparaging and aim to be contentious. While it can take a while to identify those who are ultimately going to be our friends, look out for friendship red flags just as you would when seeking romantic partners. Friends who don’t value our time, our opinion, or reciprocate our efforts are more likely to make us feel insecure or discarded. Furthermore, lifting others up, whether that’s academically, socially, or spiritually, can be a fulfilling experience. For students who have already been in college for a year or two or three, befriending students in lower years connects you to the broader college community, rather than keeping you in your bubble.
The most important contribution to peace of mind is never to do wrong. Those who lack self-control lead disturbed and tumultuous lives; their crimes are balanced by their fears, and they are never at ease.
While it’s impossible to do the right thing all the time, the easiest way to mitigate drama is to not be the instigator. At Reed, I’ve been grateful to mostly have a low-drama experience socially, save for a couple of incidents (no need to rehash them). Still, I can’t remember the last time I genuinely argued with a friend or received a text message that gave me high blood pressure. Communicating with your friends in non-accusatory ways when you have a conflict by focusing on the issue at hand rather than pointing fingers keeps situations of conflict calm and solution-oriented. Always remember that where there’s smoke, there’s usually fire, or at least a cigarette burning. Hanging out with people who are constantly in and out of friend groups and are always in some sort of trouble are usually at least a part of the issue, even if they’re not the whole issue. Keeping your side of the street clean also helps you avoid drama and be inviting to other potential friends. When you have issues with someone, address them directly instead of going behind their back, or don’t address them at all. Pick your battles. While you can’t be perfect all the time, and you’re going to do things you’re not proud of when you’re upset or aren’t sure what the right move is, apologizing sincerely without a long explanation or excuse is a good first step. If you consistently act in ways that are well-intentioned, kind, and straightforward, when you are in times of conflict, people are usually going to be more charitable toward you than if you’re always stirring the pot for fun.
For those who follow nature everything is easy and straightforward, whereas for those who fight against her, life is just like rowing against the stream.
Above everything else, deal with what is. While it’s good to look at places in the world where we can make a difference and it’s also true that creating positive change is rewarding, there are some places where you just have to accept how things are and work with reality. If you get a bad grade on a test, you can’t take that back, and arguing with the professor about every little detail is unlikely to bump your grade up by any significant margin. However, you can look toward the future and do better next time with what you’ve learned. Go to a protest and spread awareness about causes you care about, but don’t expend so much energy worrying about situations you have little control over that you can’t take care of yourself. If your friend shares a secret with someone else, you can’t change the fact that the word is out. Berating them endlessly won’t change that, and will only serve to sever the friendship further. Instead, set a firm boundary, and if they just have loose lips, learn to confide in a different friend. Constantly fighting against everything also means your attention is going in many directions instead of focusing on where you can make an impact. Be very honest about what lies within your control, and let fate handle what is outside of it.
